I am not sure what the COVID isolation has been doing to you… but for me… its making me have flashbacks to the new motherhood days. Days of being tired, exhausted, overwhelmed… it’s such a bizarre time. Not knowing what to be doing. Crying kids who seem to what food constantly… Royal Rumble wrestling here non-stop… no one sleeping properly not even the dogs. phew! It’s like we are living in the twilight zone.
The other day everyone was having a day. Including me. The day before one of my kids were really testing me. In every bit of drama happening this little monster was involved… he was the common denominator in all the problems. He got in some trouble before bed for being very rude and disrespectful towards me. We chatted and So when he woke the next morning I figured he would of moved on and changed his tune. but NOPE! he was intentionally doing things to bug everyone AGAIN!!. It was causing a snowball of madness in the house. All the kids were grumpy and it was extra noisy with all the fighting the dogs were barking… it was pure chaos.
I remember I picked up my phone and text my husband (who has been away since March 1st) “I think the kids are trying to kill me!” Inside my body it felt like a C4 was about to detonate… my head was about to explode. Can you relate to these moments?? Ugh!
It’s bananas here most of the time. I am a stay at home – work at home mom… I am an introvert… I love quiet… and alone time. So you can imagine how it can feel here at when everyone’s moods and energy are on MACH 7.
So yes… I sent my husband a text that was exaggerated and false… because what else could I do?!
SIDE NOTE: It is important to have a spouse that gets that you just need to vent it out sometimes. I don’t expect him to fix anything being 4000 km away …it is tough on the spouse to feel helpless so that is why I try not to do it often… I just need to get it out off my chest … to relieve the pressure… clear the clutter of thoughts that become consuming.
Parenting is hard. All the stages are hard. Being isolated and parenting and doing all the things is hard X 100. ISO has definitely caused me to slip back into the zone of overwhelm. How about you??
So… What did I do?? Here is what I did after the text. I walked away. I took a Mindful Momma Minute. I looked around at the kids and the house and the dogs and just said to myself, “pause… you need to breathe.” So I told the kids I was taking a minute… went to my room … closed the door… and turned on a guided meditation. I didn’t tell the kids to stop. I didn’t yell. I went in my room, put in my ear buds and felt my breathe. Slowed it down and just paused.
What happened to the kids? They stopped on their own. Yip. They cleaned the kitchen and calmed themselves down while I was in the room. Weird how that happens but I think its my energy they feed off sometimes. I felt overwhelmed therefore I couldn’t calm the room. Once I told them that I was taking a minute it was almost like a cue for them that they needed to do the same.
I came out after and chatted with the four of them to explain what I felt and why I walked away. They got it. Full disclosure… it’s not the first time this has happened to me. Motherhood is such a rollercoaster. It’s true what they say, “The days are long but the years are short,” and I feel that often. Having my tools in place has been my saving grace. And letting go of pride and ego has been a big help with helping the kids to “get it.”
If you are feeling like you are consumed try to remember to breathe instead of yelling or getting upset. Trying to push it all down won’t work either… eventually, like a hot kettle ready to whistle, you will boil over. First, pause. Second, open up the line of communication with the kids. Show them what to do when they are upset by responding in a positive way when you are overwhelmed and upset. Third, connect with your spouse and be vulnerable. let them know you just need to get it out. Fourth, Hang in there!
